Purim, Unity and Positive Peer Pressure

One of the major themes of Purim is Achdut, Jewish unity. The wicked Haman approached King Achashveirosh with the idea to annihilate the Jews, indicting them by calling them:

יֶשְׁנוֹ עַם אֶחָד מְפֻזָּר וּמְפֹרָד בֵּין הָעַמִּים

There is a certain people scattered and separate among the peoples

“Scattered” is a geographic description of the Jews. “Separate” is explained by our Rabbis as referring to the Jews’ lack of cohesion and unity at that time.

Queen Esther understood the danger posed by the absence of Achdut. When Mordechai asked her to intercede with the king on behalf of the Jews, Esther agreed with the condition that the people renew their commitment to Jewish unity:

לֵךְ כְּנוֹס אֶת כָּל הַיְּהוּדִים

Go, assemble all the Jews

Because the Jew’s answer Esther’s call, they merited to be able to defend themselves and to be saved. Towards the end of the Megillah we read (9:16):

וּשְׁאָר הַיְּהוּדִים אֲשֶׁר בִּמְדִינוֹת הַמֶּלֶךְ נִקְהֲלוּ | וְעָמֹד עַל נַפְשָׁם

And the rest of the Jews who were in the king’s provinces assembled and protected their souls

The Sefas Emes offers a beautiful interpretation to this verse, which provides a deep insight into what unity is supposed to mean. When the Jews “assembled” in unity, they were able to combine the positive forces contain within each individual and learn from each other. Their assembling together enabled them to create positive peer pressure. This positive peer pressure allowed them to overcome their more primitive and negative character traits (referred to in Kabbalah as the “nefesh”) thereby bettering themselves and the nation as a whole.

Oftentimes when children (or adults) gather together as a group, their behavior can deteriorate to the lowest common denominator. This is what we normally think of when we hear the expression “peer pressure” ie people doing the wrong thing because everyone else is doing it. In Judaism, peer pressure is supposed to encourage people to do the right thing. Let us learn from the Purim story to seek out a Jewish unity whereby we learn from each other and create positive peer pressure.

The Sefas Emes also explains that this is the essence of the Purim mitzvah of Mishloach Manot. The technical mitzvah is fulfilled by giving one person two gifts of food. However The Sefas Emes points to a passage in Tractate Megilah (7b) to explain:

Rabbah sent to Mari b. Mar by Abaye a sackful of dates and a cupful of roasted ears of corn…….The other [Mari] sent him [Rabbah] back a sackful of ginger and a cup full of long-stalked pepper. Said Abaye: Now the Master [Rabbah] will say, I sent him sweet and he sends me bitter.”

Why should we care what these Rabbis sent to each other for Mishloach Manot? The Sefas Emes explains that the Talmud is teaching us that the essence of the mitzvah is to share with others that which you have, and the other person is lacking. One Rabbi was “sweet” while the other one was more “spicy”. Through their demonstration of unity both were enriched. As we prepare to celebrate Purim let us appreciate the lesson of unity that it teaches: To be united means to share with and learn from others, thereby creating positive peer pressure to the benefit of everyone.