Friday, June 27, 2025

Kids Hear Everything: Be Aware of the Consequences

 The story of Korach is both a tragedy and a learning opportunity. As the controversy heats up, it becomes clear to Moshe that the rabble rousers will soon experience a Divine punishment. Moshe told the elders to keep their distance from Datan, Aviram and anyone else associated with Korach’s rebellion. Then the Torah describes the scene right before the earth swallows up the rabble rousers (16:27): “So the elders withdrew from around the dwelling of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram, and Dathan and Abiram went out standing upright at the entrance of their tents together with their wives, their children, and their infants.” Rashi quotes Midrash Tanchuma that wonders why the Torah mentions the children and infants and explains: “Come and see the severity of machloket (dispute). The earthly courts do not punish until an accused has reached maturity, and the heavenly court does not punish until one reaches the age of twenty, but here even nursing babies were lost. The Maharal wonders why the children were punished in this instance, when the rule is that children are not liable for punishment. He explains by quoting the Midrash that both Gehinnom and Machloket were created on the second day of Creation. Maharal explains that once the children were exposed to the controversy of their parents, they became infected and ultimately suffered the same consequences as those who initiated the dispute. What these “children of the machloket” experienced was not a punishment but rather a consequence and a natural outcome of being exposed to dispute, discord and disrespect. While it is true that we do not hold children liable for their misdeeds, we cannot protect them from ill effects if their parents expose them to negative experiences. The episode of Korach was so severe that unfortunately the children who were exposed to it were also doomed, sharing in the fate of their parents. This is a lesson for all adults, and especially for parents. Children are heavily influenced by what they see and what they hear- especially from the adults in their lives. If a child hears or sees the adults in their lives acting with discord, dispute or disrespect it will have a profound and damaging impact on them, even as we do not blame them for those sins. If a child hears lashon hara, profanities or the degradation of communal institutions / leaders at their Shabbat table – we don’t blame them for the words but we cannot protect them from the moral and spiritual damage that may result nonetheless. In the pasuk I quoted earlier, the underlined phrase in Hebrew is מִשְׁכַּן קֹרַח דָּתָן וַאֲבִירָם  . It’s interesting that we refer to the encampment of Korach and his followers as a Mishkan. We normally associate the term Mishkan with the location of Divine Presence and inspiration. With the Maharal in mind, perhaps the Torah is teaching us that the home Is a Mishkan in that it contains tremendous potential. Our homes can be a place where values are exhibited and transmitted, or it can be where children learn to mimic the mistakes and foibles of the adults around them. The story of Korach reminds us of the responsibilities that each of us has to create a spiritually nurturing and uplifting environment- for ourselves and for the next generation. 

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